John's Gospel in my heart, in my prayer ~ John 18:37

John’s Gospel challenges me.  I struggled for years trying to grasp John’s gospel as Gospel, if you will.  John’s Gospel is filled with editorial comments:  Jesus knew...Jesus was testing them...I was Jesus’ beloved.  

WARNING ~ tangent!

Hehehe.  Looks like this son of Zebedee never really let go of “When you’re king, can I sit at your right?”  Those Zebedee boys…

Alright...alrightalright.

I feel John’s Gospel is more like a document testifying to his relationship with Jesus rather than relaying events.  John’s Gospel, then, is more like his blog, if you will.

The Synoptic Gospels do have editorial comments, too, I’ll give you that. I do believe their comments are added through the Midrash tradition, though.

I like Midrash.  Every time a homily is presented, a preacher exclaims, two people share God Talk...we are midrash-ing...hehehe.  

I understand the most famous of the Midrash additions in the New Testament is ‘all are invited; but few are chosen’  something along that line, anyway.

I join a group of men from my church every week for God Talk.  We share how The Word affects us personally.  Imagine...MEN engaged in God Talk...openly...vulnerably...without fear of being wrong!

Whoa...as usual, I am all over the place here, huh?

Alright…alrightalright.

Scholars separate John from the other three evangelists, the Synoptic Gospels.  I don’t pretend to know what all of that means. It is enough for me to just hear it said…

Alright...alrightalright.

I am getting way over my head, here...digging myself into a hole too deep…

Alright...alrightalright.

I started this prayer post with the intention of writing three lines…

Even as I share my thoughts about John’s Gospel...my challenges and struggles...my whole theology is based on John’s Truth and God’s Will in Emmanuel ~ God is with us...

Here we go…

I share in my profile that I hold John’s Truth ~ God is Love ~ as my own.

John shares with us how Pilate and Jesus’ conversation progressed during Jesus’ trial.  Here Jesus outlines so clearly...so succinctly...Why God manifested as Human...What The Word made Flesh ~ Emmanuel ~ mission was, 

“For this I was born 

and for this I came into the world,
to testify to the truth.”

~ John 18:  37

Whoa…

In a much earlier prayer post ~ The Triumph of the Cross ~ In my heart ~ I suggested Jesus’ trial and crucifixion were natural consequences of his behavior.  

Am I in trouble yet?  

I hold that The Cross was ~ still is in too many ways ~ a natural consequence of Jesus’ words and actions. Jesus bucked the religious system. He challenged everyone: the righteous and societal sinners alike ~ you and me. I believe Human Jesus understood this; that it didn’t take Divine Jesus to ‘prophesy’ the catastrophe...

It is our propensity to judge one another.

We judge God’s Word relentlessly to support our personal agenda..our tradition...our culture...

Man alive, we judge Jesus through Jesus’ own words and actions.

We judge The Word manifest in Flesh.

And we kill him…

See, when I hear John report Jesus’ words...one more time…

 “For this I was born 

and for this I came into the world,
to testify to the truth.”

~ John 18:  37

I am struck to the heart.  I cry.  I praise God.

I am on this page!  God is Love.  I cannot grasp the tradition that God’s Will is for Jesus to die on the cross to save us from our sins.  I cannot grasp that God wants ANYONE to be killed. I believe...feel our Triune God knew that as Word Made Flesh God would be crucified. Our Triune God is all knowing...omniscient.  Knowing and Willing are two different things:  apples and oranges, if you will.

I am on this page!  God is Love.  I can clearly hear God saying, “Maintain Integrity to God is Love.  Stay the course with the message Emmanuel.” 

The ultimate God is Love for me

God is walking through the Garden looking for the First Two People even after knowing what they did…calling out to us,

“Where are you?”

Jesus waits for us at the tomb even after what we did to him...calling out to us by name,

“Mary.”

I wonder sometimes if Original Sin ~ if in fact there is such a thing or is it tradition ~ is a lack of integrity, a lack of responsibility, a lack of accountability...After all, the First two people kept making excuses and blaming another for their behavior.

JESUS MAINTAINED INTEGRITY.

JESUS MAINTAINED A SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY.

JESUS ASSUMED ACCOUNTABILITY TO THE WORD.

And we killed him.

I can hear God saying to Jesus, “Maintain Integrity to God is Love.  Stay the course with the message Emmanuel.  I am with you through it all.  BE God is Love ‘even unto death; death on a cross’. Let them kill us if they want to. Let them kill us if they need to.  Wait for them at the end.  Wait for them at the new beginning.  Show them Emmanuel Always.”

Ah man…

I cry.

Feel our hearts beat and sigh...